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Flashlight - to find my shotgun in the dark.
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Shotgun - Im going to cobain me out of this shit
2 picks gang!
Machete & motorbike.
Don’t forget the video camera to film it, then you can pick one item of your choice to be your loot drop for finding the set piece you just made in a left4dead level.
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Katana - because katana
First aid kit - for accidental cuts from katana
Flashlight - to see how much I’m bleeding
Two-man tent - place to swing katana in a way that will end up cutting me
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Zombie outbreak and owning a jeep? Now you got two problems!
And both problems are connected to the jeep?
I’ll take a foldable solar panel, a tablet PC with its entire storage full of porn, and the dog.
Everything else I need I’ll trade in exchange for a half hour in my dog-guarded porn booth.Phew. For a second I was concerned for the dog. The internet is a dark place
Yeah, I was wondering why there was no peanut butter in the mix 🤣.
ಠ_ಠ
It’s…your dog!
You could instead have a solar panel, light laptop with lots of nudes, and a printer. Source out the ink and paper from office buildings and trade nudes for stuff.
For that, I’d have to go into office buildings regularly, and they were full of zombies even before the apocalypse.
Solar panel’s not on there.
NO PORN FOR YOU. OFF TO HORNY JAIL WITH YOU.
I know. So I take the dog and the Jeep x3, and sell the three Jeeps to some idiots while the gas still isn’t spoiled.
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Modern jeeps require regular part swaps every few weeks
I’d swap the flashlight for the body armour - easier to find a flashlight out and about.
I’d argue you might need a flashlight to find a flashlight but most homes will at least have a small version that will suffice
I was thinking about the german shephard… regardless if it’s trained or not, it’s a liability, it might become a zombie too.
And I chose the AK-47 because I thought it came with at least 1 round of ammo 🤷.
I like the idea of everything is best-case. So a trained pup, a loaded gun with couple of boxes of spare ammo, a new jeep with a full tank, etc.
Water purifier - clean water is essential
Fire Axe - for fire wood collection as well as wood based structures for shelter and defense. Also it is a decent weapon that takes relatively little skill to effectively wield.
German Shepard - loyal and lethal companionship, living thinking alarm bell, will instinctively assist in protection/attacking, could be trained to track game. Will gladly accept food scraps, the bones and flesh of my enemies, and pets as payment for services rendered.
Body armor - reduces risk of infection through scratches to body as well as mild protection against various weapons. Also an added insulative thermal layer for the cold. Body plate can be replaced with old thinkpads as needed
I’d argue that NVGs would be better than body armor, assuming that the batteries last. Being able to see at times when humans and zombies cant is extremely valuable. Nighttime is tough without working lights.
The problem with NVG and all the battery operated stuff is that once it runs out its useless unless you have a means to replace them through looting replacable batteries or recharging lithiums with an offgrid power system and the electrical knowledge to make sure you dont cook them in case of a jerry rigged system. It might be really useful for a good couple hours of operation but after that it becomes dead weight you spend calories or fuel hauling around with the faint hope of maybe being able to recharge it again sometime in the future
Realistically, everything is finite use if you can’t maintain it. The more relevant approach is what kind of utility do you get during that thing’s lifetime, and does it outweigh the other options. NVGs, while not my choice, do provide a lot of utility, and last a fairly long time. They also don’t run the risk of full-on breaking, just running dry, meaning that they can be kept around if you think you may find batteries.
Modern nvgs aren’t battery powered the way we think any more. They last a while
4 German shepards for having sex with (i am a white woman from the American south)
I was going to say 4 German shepherds for more innocent reasons, but now my answer would be overshadowed be yours
At least someone gets fucked before getting fucked
LOL, imagine thinking a motorcycle or jeep would do you any damn good (especially after the gas you can siphon from abandoned cars has gone bad), when what you really need is a bicycle. Bikepackers and touring cyclists will be the kings of the apocalypse.
The Jeep will break down before running out of gas anyways
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The earlier in the apocalypse, the more panicking humans running around, so you’re absolutely correct there. Unfortunately, depending on where you live and how early you realize what’s happening, the roads might be utterly jammed with no hope of getting away from population centers. The bike would be less of a tank, but you’ll almost certainly make it farther - but is that any good? Unless you’re confident in your ability to go full bear grylls, it might be best to just hunker down and make as little noise as possible for that initial pandemonium.
I’d probably stay clear of basically anywhere that you’d wanna go in an apocalypse for those 72 hours, because everybody else has the same idea. Find somewhere with a second story, block or preferably destroy the staircase, and stay as quiet as possible while scavenging what you can.
I’d still say the Jeep is better shelter than the tent, though not as portable.
Assuming best case scenario (a new jeep is shat into my driveway with a full tank of gas) I think the jeep is a MASSIVE boon. It increases movement ability and hauling capacity, and can be used to clear many obstacles you’d otherwise have to go around. Is its life finite? Yes, but it’ll give you that leg up at the start of the situation that may very well set you up for success long term.
and can be used to clear many obstacles you’d otherwise have to go around.
I’m having trouble imagining any obstacle a Jeep could clear that a mountain bike couldn’t, but no trouble at all imagining the opposite.
Anything blocking paths. Can’t move broken vehicles, downed trees, etc with a bike. Sure a bike can go around, but with a jeep, I can go through, and have space to haul a bike back.
4 video cameras. I shall trade for all the above with the only source of amateur pornography.
Almost nobody picks the katana. Even the people who pick it mocking the sword!
I can’t really blame them because they didn’t give you the option to pick the complete set for the katana to shine. If you use it with fedora you can teleport behind the zombies and kill them!
Nobody knows that the katana has this hidden skill bonus if you use it with fedora because this hidden mechanic only passed to the few chosen people in the secret society hidden under the house that people like to call “the basement”
Man, the katana would be a great pick if there wasn’t two better melee options that’ll outlast the katana and offer more utility.
Is the German Shepard a rescue? Anyway that and the camcorder. I’m making cute dog videos
Username checks out
Body armor, first aid kit, machete, water purifier.
If you choose anything that requires fuel or electricity/batteries you’re fucked.
Good luck on foot, brah. I’ll be taking the jeep and hose-sucking fuel where needed. Provides shelter, warmth, storage.
He’s right, unless you study up on making biodiesel. Then you have the upper hand in the argument, as a diesel Jeep can be run on biodiesel. Rendering those fatty zombie corpses to fuel should be a functional disposal method.
That and after a while gasoline expires even in the tank of a car. After like a few months he would have to be making his own fuel anyway, because whatever gets siphoned can’t be used.
Many gasoline cars can be retrofit to run on ethanol. In the Midwest you will find more corn than you can ever use to make said ethanol.
Not a terrible play, but it has a BIG downside you might not be considering.
99.99% of the corn grown first world, and a lot of other food crops, are sterile hybrid varieties that don’t readily reseed themselves (Monsanto and company HATE when farmers don’t have to buy seed every year).
Once there is no more harvesting or maintenance on stockpile equipment, that supply will dwindle faster than you might expect.
Their have been instances of gmo corn cross breeding with heirloom corn and Monsanto suing the farmers for patent infringement.
You can use the stores for ages and since you’re not eating it you can use rotten corn. Then it’s just a matter of time for a cross to form naturally.
Fuck corn. It is patently one of the worst feedstocks for ethanol. The only reason you hear so much of it is because there is so much money wrapped up in it already and it is a way to use up excess stock. No, switchgrass is the answer. Hearty, more biomass per km² than just about any other crop, has high cellulose content (which is what gets turned into ethanol), and can be cultivated just about anywhere on the continent with little maintenance or involvement. You could probably get away with planting a few fields in pockets around a stronghold which could be checked on a couple of times a week and harvested for an extended period, then you just have to process it as usual. It is even relatively short and dense, so zombies would struggle to hide in it and it would act as a natural barrier to slow the advance of both Zs and any nairdowells that would seek to assault you. Fuel source and defensive emplacement in one.
I’m swapping the first-aid kit for the crossbow, but spot on for the rest. Body armor is rare and definitely raises your odds of survival in the short term after the initial spread. A machete is the ultimate all-purpose blade, good for defense as well as butchering, breeching, and it is easily maintained. And the water purifier is a no-brainer. Waterborn diseases are a real problem in any situation where public utilities become inaccessible and clean drinking water grows scarce.
Assuming that I am obviously able to expand my kit as I survive, the ranged weapon that uses easily craftable ammo would be ideal. A first aid kit could be cobbled together over the course of a few days of persistent scavenging. No promises on the crossbow, they are far less common than bandaids, gauze, sterilization solutions, and splints. Really the thing that would likely be the hardest to source is the suture needle that you should have in there.
I always loved 10k in Z-Nation for using the wrist rocket slingshot because that is truly the king ranged weapon for a survival scenario. Lightweight, ammo that is infinite and easily accessible, and lethal out to ranges that matter. Not to mention that they are very easy to maintain and repair.
All that said, I would likely accumulate the aforementioned electricity/fuel items as I am familiar with the production of biofuels and can build some alternative generators (wind, methane, solar concentrators) for electricity once I have somewhere secure. Methane in particular has always been attractive to me for survival scenarios because anaerobic decomposition is a great way of dealing with biowaste and what is left over ends up making really good fertilizer. Just need a couple of propane tanks, some steel, and a car battery to rig as a welder and you can turn one into a digestor and the other into storage, then get a couple 2 cycle lawnmower engines and some AC motors and you can get a power supply running. At least enough to run some incandescent bulbs. Need a voltage regulator for more complex electronics to keep the line clean, but that is a different conversation.
I picked the same you did, but I don’t know that I’d consider useable arrows easily craftable. Maybe if you had something pre-made for shafts?
Also, as I said, for usability and reliability in efficacy and ammo sourcing, nothing beats a wrist rocket slingshot. The weapon itself is lightweight and can use everything from ball bearings and buck shot to large bolts and nuts to gravel. There is virtually no terrestrial environment that you wouldn’t be able to find something that can be used as absolutely lethal ammo.
They only have to be serviceable, which is manageable just like they were made in from antiquity to the modern era, wood. It might take some practice, but a hand-carved shaft that has the tip dipped into molten lead or pewter could make a rather effective bolt. You could use more modern materials as well; various types of piping, scavenged hardware like nails and dowels, etc. They may be less accurate and harder on the crossbow, but they don’t need the longest range in this topic and the wear and tear on the crossbow may be justified if you know how to repair it and maintain it to ward off failure. Obviously, there would be trial and error, but it wouldn’t take too long to become a competent Fletcher.
What’s the body armor for? Zombies will bite you on the neck.
I don’t have a PhD in zombiology but zombies will bite you wherever they can. Depending on what kind of zombies we’re talking about a bite alone might turn you or not. So body armor could be useful for some kinds of zombies and utterly useless for others.
It’s good for general protection too. It can soften blows from other humans or just accidental injury while scavenging dilapidated buildings. What we consider to be minor bumps and scrapes now can be life threatening when you have inadequate medical supplies, malnutrition, sleep deprived, no sanitation, etc.
A motorcycle could get you out of the city/infected zone pretty fast though. Not a bad choice.
True and all the road will be blocked with traffic, so you can lane split with the motorcycle.
Problem is you’re sleeping in the open air unless you grab the tent. Also can’t really build a collection of supplies.
Eh, batteries aren’t hard to charge as long as it’s a small item like a flashlight.
Gas will expire eventually and you could just hotwire one of the many abandoned cars anyways, if the roads aren’t blocked by said cars. Bullets will run out unless you find a gun shop, in which case you get guns anyways. Water purifying is easy enough to do without a machine.
My picks would be German Shepherd, Axe, First Aid, and Radio.
There’s a reason we domesticated dogs, they are useful in so many different ways like hunting, defense, and security (and companionship). Especially German Shepherds, you can see the damage they do when used by police.
Axes are survivalist 101 and some are practically multi tools despite being simple.
First Aid because infections, zombie or not, are the real killers throughout history.
The radio’s more of a gamble, but it’s your best chance to find a new settlement, monke strong together and all that. Also you can maybe stay informed on what’s happening in other parts of the country. (And it lets me flex my Amateur Radio License).
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I feel the tracking and hunting capabilities of a dog will more than make up for what they need to eat.
I think I’d take the night vision goggles over the radio. You’re much more likely to find a radio. Situational awareness at night will be a huge survival factor.
Four chain saws
come at me bro
Two for the hands and one for the head?
One for both heads
Water purifier: you need water to live. Otherwise you’ll die in 3 days.
Jeep: While not the most reliable, they can go off-road and can also be a source of shelter in lieu of a house or tent.
AK: Extremely reliable and easy to service. 7.62 ammo can be harder to come by depending on where you live, but regardless, the AK is a solid weapon.
Fire Axe: Good for chopping down trees, cracking heads or breaking down doors. The practicality is what makes it the better option
I chose similarly but changed somethings for longevity.
I subbed out the jeep for body armor. The jeep will run out of gas eventually, who knows how long the apocalypse will last for. Body armor will be last near indefinitely. Also would swap out the ak for a machete. Ammo will probably be hoarded by others so will be a difficult find.
Fire axe is a great utility tool, once it becomes dull, it’ll be a good blunt weapon. Machete will not be as good but if you learn how to sharpen or find a whetstone, they’ll last you as long as you need.
Most body armor is good for 1 strike. Kevlar thread break, ceramic breaks, and you really don’t want to use dented armor, best case it’s a weak point, worst case is pushing in your chest cavity preventing you from breathing. Any body armor that is remotely mobile is effectively one time use. Now admitted (normally) used body armor can still provide some protection and can be better than nothing (except in situations where the damage impacts you, ie the plate metal being dented and pushing into your chest). And some can be repaired or replaced with the right materials and tools, but those are heavy, and take space
Going with all but the water purifier. Fresh water is too easy to come by where I live. We have pristine wild rivers here, and it rains a lot. I’d be living in the forest anyway if this happened.
So I’m going with AK, Jeep, body armor, and Axe.
I chose the same top 3. Torn on the 4th between fire ax, first aid, or flash light.