the only reason i enjoy hug people as much as i do today is because when i was in high school showing physical affection was mandatory. that was how you told them they had succeeded in breaking you out of your shell, and could now stop trying.
“Being bad at stuff” is also so selective. The other kids are not expected to be two years ahead in math, but I am expected to be able to sit perfectly still for 4 hours and pay attention in an oxygen depleted room. Everybody has to have this nearly exact same skillset.
It’s not what society needs, not even what the industry needs in the workforce, but that is most convenient for the teachers.
That low oxygen training will come handy when you work on a spaceship or a submarine. Training the spacemen of tomorrow!
Its actually what corporate needs.
In fact, your being two years ahead in math makes your inability to sit still all the more disappointing. See above the lesson on Fulfilling Your Potential.
that is most convenient for the teachers
Nope, also extremely inconvenient to them. It’s only actually convenient for a small selection of neurotypicals with ideal or near ideal home lives/parent involvement, while nearly every other kid benefits from basic adhd accomodations like fidget toys or being allowed to sit/lie wherever to do their work. We haven’t made any significant progress on teaching since the victorian era.
Just for the hell of it, if you want a well researched book about the value of all sorts of Rest to dispute that specific point.
I remember when I was really, really young I hadn’t figured out all the nuanced definitions of the word “bad”. At some point (I think it was in Sunday school) I told an adult that I put cereal in the fridge once. They said that was bad. So then I was all like “fuck, I guess I’m going to hell”
Things were going great for me too. I was looking forward to heaven. I mean, sure, I’d lied, cheated, had bad thoughts, murdered a few people here and there, had wild sex with everyone, you know, the usual, but it was all good, still goin to heaven. But fuck me, I put the cereal in the refrigerator yesterday and now I’m doomed to spend eternity in hell. I was THIS close.
Not even ADHD (but am autistic) and this hit hard
Etiquette one I don’t agree. It’s just being respectful and mindful. You will acknowledge it once you see the absolute lack of it.
One of the things my parents did understand correctly as “new money” is that a significant portion of piddling etiquette rules about what color to wear at what times of the year and which fork goes on the left were largely ways for the bourgeoisie to attempt to maintain their advanced standing against the increases in (the potential for) equality that capitalism initially brought about. Unfortunately my parents are also a very “well we got ours so everyone else must be lazy” type of people who think that’s as good as equality can or should get.
Really depends on what part of it. There are things like offering your bus seat to someone who needs it, or waiting for people to exit before you enter. Those indeed make sense.
And then there’s what the other commenters pointed out, arbitrary rules about what cutlery to use and in which hand and such.
Except etiquette extends beyond just “common social etiquette”. Using a knife and fork the “correct way” is etiquette. Eating soup by scooping the spoon away from oneself is etiquette. Placing your cutlery the correct way on the dish when you’re finished is etiquette and varies wildly by country. These are just examples of dining etiquette, there’s much more. Its all bullshit and I agree it should boil down to being respectful and mindful, but depending who raised you it may happen that you get reprimanded and punished for not following very arbitrary rules.
Agree. English isn’t my first language and I did not know it also meant dining etiquette.
Considering every culture has completely different etiquette, I’d argue otherwise. We’re talking drinking from bowls vs talking during a meal style stuff. I’ll hold my fork with the right hand and knife in left, despite being right handed and no etiquette freak can stop me!
Yeah, if anyone is bothered by which hand I hold my fork in, I’d say they should see a therapist and work it out on their end.
I don’t think this means “Etiquette (please and thank you)”, I think this means “Etiquette (look at this rube using his crab fork to grab pasta, what a yokel)”
Even cursive writing was not designed to be faster like my teacher said, it was to weed out the yokels from the gentlemen. A Thomas Jefferson-style hand, full of curlicues and serifs and f/s-es (i.e.“difcufsion” for discussion) could be read or written by a person whose wealth enabled their education, but not by someone whose literacy was achieved by reading the family Bible and local newspaper.
Damn I never knew that
Makes more sense. I just use my hands.
Why the fuck does it matter how I hold my forkor what spoon I eat soup with? Why does it matter where my ellbows are?
Idk why everyone is talking about dining etiquette.
Yeah makes you wonder the real meaning behind what they’re saying.
We live in a society.
no we don’t
we did. now we don’t.
Bottom text
too real
Hard agree, I relate to all of the above
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A lot of these I remember learning from teachers rather than my parents. Also reinforced by other kids, assorted relatives, etc. Even good parents can’t protect you from the rest of society.