How is this not satire? How do real, breathing people think that, not only is this a real thing that will work, but that blabbing it out on live tv is a good idea?! Fuck.
Do you remember this?
He actually made great increases in Hispanic votes
no one ever went, broke, underestimating the vast mass of people
Well, hispanics or latinos aren’t a single monolithic group of people. Some of them see the other latino immigrants (especially the undocumented) with disdain. It’s just a matter of stroking their ego and saying whatever that sticks to the single issue voters.
Especially newish immigrants. They’re big on business tax breaks, They don’t want more aliens coming in because it’s direct competition.
Not in 2016 which is when the tweet is from. He did almost exactly as well as Romney 4 years before.
The whole thing is pretty basic. And perhaps that’s why it’s so horrifying.
People like you and I that find this insulting and absurd? We weren’t voting GOP anyway, no loss.
People watching Fox News? They’re nodding their heads, “Yeah. That makes sense.”
See? Fox isn’t losing voters it didn’t have anyway, and at the same time, they’re making their viewers more comfortable.
Everyone loves to see their opinions validated by a white man in a suit.
Hey, punks get really uncomfortable when we hear a white man in a suit say what we’re thinking. Even mundane shit like “let’s grab a falafel”
How do real, living breathing people continue to -watch- this garbage?
trump is absolutely both stupid enough and racist enough to think he bought the black vote by offering gold shoes.
hes grifter scum through and through
Not to mention narcissistic and egotistical
The onion is on fire this week.
Wait…
I hope the Biden campaign is ignoring all of the ridiculous distractions out there and actually focusing on releasing a fly-ass sneaker befitting the office of the President of the United States.
The real question is which one is going to get their sneakers on the feet of an NBA heavyweight during a game?
And which rapper will sport Biden’s sneakers when Kanye inevitably wears Trump’s monstrosities?
Oh I fully expected them to be a design collaboration with will.i.am
At this point someone at the Biden campaign thinking that copying this is a good idea wouldn’t even surprise me.
“DEY ALSO LOVE EATING THE WATERMELONS, HAVE CHICKEN AND WAFFLES WITH A SIDE OF SPRITE, WHILE SMOKING MENTHOL CIGARETTES! DEM BLACK PEOPLE WILL SURELY VOTE FOR US IF WE ALL CATER TO THEIR CULTURAL VALUES!”
This guy’s mind right now.
Ok. But who doesn’t like fried chicken? Like that is not just one group of people.
Same with watermelon. What group doesn’t like delicious fruit? Not anybody I wanna be associated with.
I guess we can’t be friends, then. I don’t like how watermelon tastes. I do love cutting it up and giving it to my ducks, though
No that counts we’re friends
Oh awesome!
You’re lucky they’re a duck.
ETA: “Well that’s just ducky” would have been better.
But I’m not a duck? If anything I’d be a turkey.
I know it’s silly on a couple levels, but it made me happy you are happy that we can be friends despite our vast watermelon differences. Please tell your ducks I said hello, friend.
I don’t like watermelon. (I gave that up in the bargain.)
Do go on…
Edit: seriously, what? You can’t leave us hanging
If I reveal the benefits, I lose them.
Can you tell me the other drawbacks?
I mean the bargain itself just had the cost of liking watermelon. I was warned about more consequences, but none of the usual stuff was part of it. I also can’t disclose a bunch of information about the specifics of how the bargain was made, the organization, etc. I don’t remember what the Enforcement mechanism was, either. I have a copy of the terms from the organization that helped me establish contact, but I can’t really reference the entire thing because about 2 years ago it got covered in McDonald’s Big Mac Sauce and it dried before I noticed. It’s currently sitting at the bottom of a drawer covered in (iirc) wax paper and several other documents on top of it. I’m 90% sure that the words still exist, and I’m afraid that if I clean the document the words might be damaged and I’m fairly concerned with the potential metaphysical implications. I also don’t remember all of the information that I’m prohibited from disclosing, so I won’t be going into any further details about that.
Diabetes
I was hoping a warlock pact.
Fried chicken is what stands between me and being a vegetarian.
Massachusetts banned the sale of menthol cigarettes and I always found that as a surprisingly racist move.
Sure, white people smoke menthol…sometimes. But proportionally, far more black people smoke menthol, and far more black smokers choose menthol.
Now, I quit smoking many years ago (thank fuck), but we had Newport Reds as a rather new variety when I was nearing the end of my smoking tenure. They were non-menthol, while Newport is traditionally a menthol brand, and these were in a red pack. Non-menthol. They were hard as fuck. I loved them.
Now, the menthol ban had been in place a while at this point, as I said, non-smoker. I had gone out for some beers and was trying to find a pack of my friends brand, as she had fallen on hard times and I thought it a nice gestur. Her brand was Camel Crush, which starts of regular and has a menthol bead in the filter which can be “crushed” to make it a menthol cigarette). I found it to be completely unavailable after like three shops. Thats how I found out about the ban.
I asked about the green pack of Newports. Turns out they are non-menthol, and that pissed off a lot of unsuspecting people.
Thank you for attending my TEE talk. Souvenir belt onions are available in the lobby.
Used to live in DC. Smoked.
Picked up the habit for menthols cuz all my co-workers were black and all of them who smoked were smoking menthols. Marlboro not P-funks, but still.
Is it an appropriate response at this point to shake my head, sigh, and say “Jesus Fucking Christ?”
We’re all doing it, so absolutely!
Many including myself have been doing it since the mid 2010s.
yea I think so
Again. You’ve already had several occasions to do so.
Instead of saying JFC, say KFC and go have some tasty chicken.
that hair is weirding me out. thin, receding hairline in the front yet solid black on the side? must be using the same stylist as giuliani.
He looks like he went to the barber and asked for the MS Paint
Probably the same can of spray-on hair that Stephen Miller uses
Looks pretty sus.
What the fuck is wrong with people
This guy specifically? He’s a racist asshole, who has been surrounded by other racist assholes and gotten support from them, so he has never learned that his behavior is unacceptable in a society that values freedom.
Trump actually does have a lot of- very misplaced, truly unfortunate- support from young black men. It makes about as much sense as one of his speeches, and is as upsetting, but it’s true to some extent.
This kind of shit is nothing new.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Association_of_German_National_Jews
They must be under serious delusion about what the con movement really is about. That, or they think that under a con world order, they’ll be treated like one of “the good ones”. And they even might be. For a while. There was a Jews For Hitler group, too.
There always will be individuals that choose to be a contrarian just because and paint themselves as “the misunderstood visionary trapped with the sheeples”.
Anyone else go to Fox for your black people news?
/c/BlackPeopleFoxNews would be an interesting place.
TBH this news is pretty mid compared to the Nazi booth at CPAC.
Republicans have become so weak that they have to take whoever still wants to deal with them.
Someone what’s to call Black people “basketball Americans” so bad.
What a great outreach plan. Anyone that votes for Rapey McTinyD over sneakers [1] is a fucking idiot, in any case.
Maybe they can get a stupid t-shirt to go with the sneakers: “I bought Chinese footwear and funneled money to and/or voted for a fascist and all I got was this Chinese t-shirt and the loss of freedom”.
[1] The entire “fashion world” is a complete load of nonsense anyway, going back to its roots and used as a mechanism of control from the outset. People that are supposedly “woke” but then fall into this trap seems to be almost a cliche at this point. I’m sure “sneakerheads” honestly think “the street” is what are setting these trends (lol), but…
Klaus Nomi is on fox news now? Wild.
Don’t do Klaus dirty like that. (I totally see it though)
