• captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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        10 days ago

        Yes, but if you’re dating someone because of who you can change them into you’re setting yourself up for disappointment.

        • TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world
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          10 days ago

          not necessarily. a lot of people date people based on potential, and they will leave or stay if that potential manifests.

          at least, that’s how it used to be. true in 2026 that people increasingly want ‘it all’ from the get go. which is why folks are so miserable. if you are 25 and expect to date someone making 200K a year, you are going to have a bad time. you should be dating someone who makes 50K who will be making 200K in 10-20 years.

          So on and so on. a lot of people are very different physically over the years too. one of my major conflicts in dating was I was trying to improve myself, and my girlfriends didn’t want to do that, and resented me for it. they didn’t want to eat well, exercise, or invest in themselves. They wanted to just sit around and drink and veg out and thought I was a jerk for wanting to be active and healthy.

          Anyway, I’m single now but I’m very healthy, active, and financially secure. most ladies I meet on the dating market are maybe 1 of those three, and they demand a man be all and he has to be jacked and fashionable. It’s wild how folks demand so much from others but so little from themselves.

          • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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            10 days ago

            Yeah stupid high standards also aren’t what I’m advocating for. I may not be an expert, but I’m happily married.

            Being with someone with similar goals to you is important. Going in expecting your partner to have figured everything out is important. But also important is being ok with where they are.

            If you go into a relationship with someone who’s fat you need to be ok with the reality that they might never become skinny, even if they want to (but also it’s a lot of work and plenty of people are ok with their body as is).

            I’d never enter a financially tied relationship with a spendthrift, it would stress me the hell out and I’d rather be single. But a partner who struggles with depression, adhd, and other mental issues that can get in the way of life? Yeah I can live with that, though it’s important that she not be resigned to it and that she keep trying to deal with it. A partner who isn’t as in shape as I prefer to be? Yeah I can live with that, I’d prefer if she be interested in and capable of long walks and going on bike rides, but if not that’s ok.

            Plenty of chronically single people have too high standards, but getting a fixer upper isn’t a happy sustainable solution, figuring out your actual priorities and becoming the sort of person who’s attractive to the people who match those priorities is. Or don’t, I already got mine.

  • Captain Baka@feddit.org
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    12 days ago

    lose my virginity to her

    Obviously fake. As if a 4chan user is ever going to lose his virginity.

  • kivihiili@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    12 days ago

    squishier girls are cute and adorable and incredibly lovable too :3 (and awesome to snuggle with)

    honestly get real anon uwu

      • rbos@lemmy.ca
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        11 days ago

        Lass needs some extra buffer to survive the English raiders.

    • Hoimo@ani.social
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      11 days ago

      Muscles are still squishy when relaxed. It’s not like Michael Phelps is permanently hard as steel.

      Only when he sees you ;3

      • KuroiKaze@lemmy.world
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        10 days ago

        I have had numerous women tell me they dated lower body fat guys and found the cuddling to be significantly worse. Getting shredded is not what women generally want you to do it’s what guys want you to do.

    • Corkyskog@sh.itjust.works
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      11 days ago

      You don’t understand Women’s insecurities very well. Her confidence is now tied to OP. She doesn’t believe she is a 10, she believes that OP makes her a 10.

      Assuming it wasn’t fake and gay of course…

  • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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    10 days ago

    Sounds like a lot of work. I just date women I find attractive regardless of size and encourage them to live a lifestyle that makes them happy. If a hot chick that’s into me is fat I’m just going to be happy a hot chick is into me.

  • Lka1988@sh.itjust.works
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    10 days ago

    “I beat the game”

    Lmao, people who think marriage is like the final boss of a video game clearly have no idea what kind of life they’re in for. You got married, congrats, you beat THE TUTORIAL. Now welcome to REAL LIFE.

    I have met newlyweds like this. They don’t last. Nothing wrong with celebrating the marriage, of course, but “happily ever after” is a fairy tale for a reason.

    • TankovayaDiviziya@lemmy.world
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      10 days ago

      Each people grew up differently. I was taught to live my life and be myself at an early age. But as I grow older I realised not everyone were taught the same. I love my mates but two of them are conformists as if relationships are end-all-be-all. They kinda think that there are arbitrary goal posts to reach at certain age.

      • Napster153@lemmy.world
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        10 days ago

        Is Occam’s Razor the right term here?

        What I do know is that people in happy marriages or divorce on good terms are often not the ones making the loudest noise.

        While it’s true that we should advance at our own pace, what’s also true is that we shouldn’t get comfortable with the idea that things will always go our way, especially as we age.

        Often, having a good relationshio or, better, a marriage is exactly what people need in case things happen that would otherwise leave us vulnerable, and it goes both ways.

  • FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world
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    12 days ago

    Doesn’t anon mean “but” instead of “and” in the last sentence? It’s annoying me how often people seem to mix these two words

  • hOrni@lemmy.world
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    12 days ago

    After losing weight You will not look as if You’ve never had that weight.

    • 9point6@lemmy.world
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      12 days ago

      (slightly funny for me to say this on a greentext comm, but)

      I hope you don’t go around actually saying that to overweight people who are working hard on improving themselves, you might as well be saying:

      “What are you even bothering for? You’ve fucked it. Game over. Damage done.”

      And for a percentage of those people, that’s going to be the line that does make them give up on improving themselves.

      • spicy pancake@lemmy.zip
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        11 days ago

        I mean it is true though, I know from firsthand experience. So it’s additional evidence that the poster is full of shit and made this up as a weird fantasy where they get to be clever and also objectify women lol

    • TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world
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      10 days ago

      that depends on the amount of weight.

      most folks can swing 20-30lbs without consequence. when it gets to like 50lb, yeah you have some issues with not returning to form.

      what’s terrifying is how many folks are like… massively overweight. 20lbs overweight is like nothing these days. my own weight can change 20lbs from winter to summer, but that’s only 10% of my body mass.