I’m trying out Bumble bff, hoping this is better than dating apps. I want to meet people, and it’s hard doing that in your 20s!

Ayy join the club.

This reminds me of me. I am never going back to online dating again because it gives so much false hope in my experience. I think all you can do with this person is stick by them and hope that they’ll learn their lesson one day. When you have the “love brain” switched on, it’s really difficult to think logically. Therapy helps and really noticing how you feel.

A question for your Monday night - how do people manage to push through and get their work done?

I cannot get started on my uni work because of an overwhelming “paralysis” feeling where I cannot push myself to do anything.

Good luck mate <3

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Good luck in there!

Thank you to the wonderful people here who gave me words of advice yesterday. I read it all and it made me feel warm and fuzzy inside :)

I met bar guy’s friends tonight and there was one there I could tell that had a little crush on him. You can sort of tell by the way someone interacts with another person, because she was only interacting like that with him.

I find out more about this girl, and she’s pretty much got the exact same interests as the dude, and the way they interacted was just effortless and it seemed like they had a great connection.

Compare that to me, I pretty much don’t have anything in common with him, we don’t like the same movies or music, or things in general. I am a shy and awkward piece of shit who for some reason has started feeling nervous around him as well. I lose my sense of self, it’s not like I had one to begin with anyway. I’m an average Joe, an uncultured swine.

The thought of breaking up with him makes me incredibly sad. However, I don’t want to force what isn’t there. I think he is only with me because I gave him a chance. I could be the most stale person in the room but because I was there for him when he needed it and can meet his physical touch needs, it’s alright. That’s why I don’t have a clear gut feeling on how to proceed.

All this coupled with uni kicking my ass, not sleeping enough, low iron, ADHD, brain fog and financial strain is absolutely fucking killing me.

I just wish things would get better!

I’ve had a cough in the morning and evening for two weeks now. Excited for it to go away

I went out with my sister and her friend tonight and the two of them were clearly different people.

When we went separate ways with the friend, I turned to my sister and said,

“You and _____ are so different, how did you become friends?”

She said,

“We have similar morals and we vibe (which I think means connect emotionally and get along well).”

That was the point where I realised I haven’t emotionally connected with someone like that in YEARS. Everything has felt so surface level. The last time I felt like that about someone was probably high school (which I’d say wasn’t that long ago, being a non-mature aged uni student now).

It’s been a very long time since I’ve felt like someone gets me and I get them, like we’re on the same wavelength. It’s a sad reality that the people I see the most are not THE people that I “vibe” with. No wonder why I feel so freaking sad all the time - that’s definitely a reason.

Me to bar guy: it literally takes 30 seconds to send a text message to ask someone how they are and show you care.

Him: you’re underestimating the amount of time it takes for me to text

🤦‍♂️

Happy Tuesday! One day closer to Friday.

Question - what’s your go-to breakfast? Mine is nothing at the moment, or just a protein shake.

I dislike the fact that I find it difficult to be okay with people I’m close to not reaching out for a while. Perhaps that’s the whole “rejection sensitive dysphoria” part of ADHD.

My attempt at a rational mind says, “They’re busy and you’re busy. Now suck it up and get a life.”

My emotional mind however, says, “Ahhhhhh we just wanna be close to ____, why are they so distant?!”

I just wanna do my work without my emotional mind being a bitch!

I have this urge to cut everyone off. I deleted Insta so I talk to no one and archived all my chats except with close family. I’ll probably redownload it tomorrow, but I need to stop focusing on other people and focus on myself and my degree. I want to graduate end of next year.

I am craving chocolate mousse.

Not asking for instant but more regular. Replying straight away scares me off too.

Me being ND or my partner? Because I am an ADHDer myself

I think I have figured out what my relo problem is.

It’s the consistency. I think because I might send a message one day and then I get a reply the next day or even the day after sometimes, I just want more.

It’s probably a bit much of me to expect that from someone if they’re busy and hardly on their phone, but even just a dot or an emoji or something that would take five seconds to send would keep me at bay. I’ve dealt with inconsistency in a relationship before and it turned out that that person didn’t have good intentions. I know rationally with this guy, he’s not an absolute prick and wouldn’t do that. I know that he does care. Unless I’m lying to myself

I think a simple message each day would just show that he cares and is willing to put in the effort.

Am I asking for too much?

Communicating when you don’t know what’s up is hard but will do somehow. 🫡🫡🫡

I agree, and yeah occasionally he does. It’s not a daily non-negotiable thing that he does, whereas it sort of is for me. I’ve held back a bit though.

He’s definitely more attentive in person