“b-but bears are actually dangerous!” Shut the hell up.

  • curiousPJ@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    39
    arrow-down
    13
    ·
    6 months ago

    Not sure what else this meme is doing other than actively creating a bigger divide between the genders…

    • bbuez@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      16
      arrow-down
      39
      ·
      edit-2
      6 months ago

      Maybe a divide for you, my SO says she’d pick the bear if it wasn’t me. And I don’t blame her.

      Instead of arguing the merits of this debate, maybe its worth analyzing your own merits. Men (individually but amongst their peers) should be ashamed that women typically seem to want to pick a bear over themselves, instead of falling further into the rut that pushes everyone - not just women - away from their social circles and friend.

      Someone tells you they’d rather be getting mauled by a bear? Take the hint. The divide exists within your head, make friends, be kind, and you’ll find happiness

      Edited for individuals to contextualize on their peers instead of generically

      Edit edit, I mean go ahead, be reactionary

      • barsoap@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        29
        arrow-down
        8
        ·
        edit-2
        6 months ago

        Men should be ashamed that women typically seem to want to pick a bear over themselves

        Shame is an individual thing. Men, plural, is a whole bunch of people. Why should I be ashamed for the actions of people that aren’t me?

        …and just to be clear here: I’m not even arguing that we shouldn’t battle this one out between the genders. But collective punishment is against the Geneva convention and I really don’t like to stay quiet when people commit war crimes.

        • Cryophilia@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          4
          arrow-down
          3
          ·
          6 months ago

          So my initial response was “jesus fuck that’s some unnecessary hyperbole, I get your point but that’s ridiculous”

          And then I realized that’s the same response I have with women who pick the bear so

          I dunno

          Maybe you all suck?

              • barsoap@lemm.ee
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                2
                ·
                6 months ago

                It depends. Largely on whether it’s obvious that it’s hyperbole.

                Though as far as the gender war is actually a war I still think that the Geneva convention should definitely apply. By, you know, analogy.

        • bbuez@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          7
          arrow-down
          15
          ·
          edit-2
          6 months ago

          Wait sorry I just read your comment, who the fuck said war crimes? You should be ashamed of your peers if they’re misogynistic, whats a war crime there lmfao

          • barsoap@lemm.ee
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            15
            arrow-down
            4
            ·
            6 months ago

            Me. I said war crimes. Collective punishment is a war crime. You cannot hold people to account on the basis of group membership.

            If you want to make a sensible statement, try “You should be ashamed if you don’t distance yourself from misogynists”. In that case you say someone should be ashamed for their own actions (or inaction), not for something some amorphous group did. Also changing the general “men” to “your peers” is peak goalpost moving.

            • bbuez@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              5
              arrow-down
              12
              ·
              edit-2
              6 months ago

              I dont know what you think my goal is, clearly you’re better at phrasing, so if we go with “You should be ashamed if you don’t distance yourself from misogynists”, where is our disagreement?

              You think I shouldnt be ashamed of the friends I once had? Because I certainly am. You should be ashamed of people who break social contract, because that is explicitly what that would entail.

              • barsoap@lemm.ee
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                14
                arrow-down
                2
                ·
                6 months ago

                You think I shouldnt be ashamed of the friends I once had? Because I certainly am.

                Given that you said “once had” not “still have”, no I don’t think you should be ashamed. Having broken with them, having learned, what blame is there that could be laid on you?

                • bbuez@lemmy.world
                  link
                  fedilink
                  arrow-up
                  2
                  arrow-down
                  9
                  ·
                  6 months ago

                  Because I was once naïve to who they are now, and perhaps being younger at the time I could have, maybe, been a more potent guiding voice to a couple guys in specific, and only later did I learn what they had committed when I was still associated. And if that shame is a way I can guarantee my merrits, then I can live with it.

                  • barsoap@lemm.ee
                    link
                    fedilink
                    arrow-up
                    7
                    arrow-down
                    1
                    ·
                    6 months ago

                    Is that shame necessary to guarantee your merits, though?

                    If you can still learn from it, then it still has a purpose. If everything is learned, then it doesn’t, and it is only hindering you. That call will be up to you, your understanding of the circumstances, and your conscience, but one thing is for sure: It makes no sense to worry about things that are outside of your control, and your past is very much among the things not in your control. So don’t fret about letting it be nothing to you.

          • jnk@sh.itjust.works
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            10
            arrow-down
            6
            ·
            edit-2
            6 months ago

            You should be ashamed of your peers

            That’s exactly the war crime mentioned before. How is that different from blaming every german for being from the same country as nazis?

            Edit: The nazi analogy was just me trying to find an example that even a moron could understand.

            … I failed miserably

              • redisdead@lemmy.world
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                4
                ·
                edit-2
                6 months ago

                Ignoring Godwin’s law isn’t the argument ender you think it is, fine, how is it different than blaming all black people for violent gang crime?

            • bbuez@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              4
              arrow-down
              11
              ·
              6 months ago

              Lmfao, being socially ashamed of the peers you choose to associate with === being a German during the nuremburg trials?? You know what was probably 110% worse? Being Jewish in Nazi occupied territory.

              Get a goddamn grip on reality. If I had said ship all men tp Australia sure, my apologizes my original phrasing didn’t appease you enough. Professional victimhood at its finest.

              Im sorry you got rejected one too many times, hope you can figure it out.

          • mojofrododojo@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            2
            arrow-down
            4
            ·
            6 months ago

            Yeah they just wanted to throw random shit out - like women picking the bear is a war crime because it punishes all men. I think they want women to choose to take the risk of potentially gambling their life away AND be raped / kidnapped, they shouldn’t just be able to risk a life threatening mauling because that would punish all men

            jfc the gymnastics these fucks will go in order to deny that rape and kidnap are genuinely things men do, and have historically done to the point where women literally have to carry the stress of self defense 24/7 and even worse, their most frequent assailants are known.

            SO FUCK YEAH BRING ON THE BEAR, they probably don’t know them personally so that’ll up the odds that the bear will just ignore them. And even if the bear kills them brutally, it’s not going to rape them, so they got that going. But it’s a war crime to pick the bear jfc

            • barsoap@lemm.ee
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              2
              arrow-down
              1
              ·
              edit-2
              6 months ago

              like women picking the bear is a war crime because it punishes all men.

              Not what I said. Demanding that I feel ashamed because there’s men who do shitty things is the collective punishment, the war crime.

              Have you ever considered that there’s humans who do shitty things? Why aren’t you ashamed of that? Why are you shirking responsibility? Are you secretly in league with them? Why are you not experiencing crippling guilt, knowing that Hitler and Pol Pot exist and are of your group, as I just randomly assigned it? Why aren’t you flagellating yourself yet?

              Yes, the statement is hyperbolic – obviously. But you should be able to see how the general pattern, not just its extreme, is toxic.

              • mojofrododojo@lemmy.world
                link
                fedilink
                English
                arrow-up
                1
                ·
                6 months ago

                Demanding that I feel ashamed because there’s men who do shitty things is the collective punishment

                where did I do that? seriously, point out where I told you to feel ashamed.

                Never did. Are you a rapist? then you have nothing to worry about.

                You’re hyperbole is pointless. I don’t feel guilt for hitler and polpot because I’m not a racist genocidal maniac.

                So what’s the root of your guilt mate?

                Past coming back to haunt you? If not, pick team bear dude, it’s the logical choice.

                • barsoap@lemm.ee
                  link
                  fedilink
                  arrow-up
                  1
                  arrow-down
                  1
                  ·
                  edit-2
                  6 months ago

                  where did I do that? seriously, point out where I told you to feel ashamed.

                  You didn’t, someone else did and that’s where I brought up the whole collective punishment being a war crime thing. Simply wanted to set the record straight on what it was a reference to.

                  So what’s the root of your guilt mate?

                  Well, two decades ago I did engage in gang-tickling of gals. Nope I’m not sorry, they’re not traumatised, also I got a date out of it but I can definitely see how some people would like to tie a noose from that one.

                  Would you choose the bear, the guy with downcast eyes boiling with repressed rage, or the one pushing you into the swimming pool while you test the temperature?

                  Never got good at stealing scrunchies, I’ll have to pass on that one. And don’t tell me only guys do that kind of thing I once had to fish my home keys out of panties.

                  • mojofrododojo@lemmy.world
                    link
                    fedilink
                    English
                    arrow-up
                    1
                    ·
                    6 months ago

                    Would you choose the bear, the guy with downcast eyes boiling with repressed rage, or the one pushing you into the swimming pool while you test the temperature?

                    what the fuck are you on about?

                    scrunchies?

                    go back to middle school you child

        • bbuez@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          3
          arrow-down
          16
          ·
          edit-2
          6 months ago

          Ah well there’s that pesky language thing, I do mean individually, if I intended carrying the burden of sins of all my fathers I would be weighed down to hell.

          Edit: Actually, I don’t mean individually, if you have a friend that you tolerate some of their more misogynistic views, try to actually be the better influence, Ive failed some former friends in that regard, and they will fall deeper into that pit.

          Edit edit: some nice upstanding men here, you wouldnt hold your friend accountable to SA?

          • barsoap@lemm.ee
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            16
            arrow-down
            3
            ·
            6 months ago

            I don’t have misogynistic friends for the simple reason that I don’t make friends with assholes.

            • bbuez@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              3
              arrow-down
              14
              ·
              6 months ago

              What a gotcha, im sure you never got to know someone well enough their true colors start to show? Because from my experience, they know to hide their true intentions because it tends to push people away. And thats when you cut them out. Whats so complicated?

              • jnk@sh.itjust.works
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                9
                arrow-down
                2
                ·
                6 months ago

                Ok ok, let me understand you:

                • You had bad experiences with people of the other gender.
                • You think now that every man is exactly the same, and if they don’t, they’re just evil manipulators who want to hide their true evil nature.
                • You’re complaining about people who generalize with the other gender because of their past experiences (aka. sexists).
                • You 100% agree with the post, so you support neglecting people’s feelings as long as they’re from the other gender.

                So… Are you a sexist incel? Why should men respect your feelings or validate your past experiences then? Stop trying to solve sexism with more sexism, it doesn’t work like that. And please don’t disrespect me or assume shit from my personal life amymore, it’s just lame.

                • bbuez@lemmy.world
                  link
                  fedilink
                  arrow-up
                  2
                  arrow-down
                  8
                  ·
                  6 months ago

                  Where the fuck did you come from? It aint my fault some men are sensitive and cant just ignore comments online lol

              • barsoap@lemm.ee
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                6
                arrow-down
                3
                ·
                6 months ago

                They want confirmation, acknowledgement, so the second a tastefully edgy joke is cracked their true colours are going to come flying because they’ll say something that’s just offensive, not actually funny.

      • redisdead@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        11
        arrow-down
        3
        ·
        6 months ago

        Excuse me?!

        The fuck should I be ashamed for?

        Why am I responsible for the actions of other men?

        Go have your fucking guilt trip if you want to but don’t include me.

        • bbuez@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          3
          arrow-down
          12
          ·
          6 months ago

          Reading comprehension, my apologies for the poor original phrasing, but yes you should be ashamed if you dont get the point.

          • redisdead@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            8
            arrow-down
            1
            ·
            6 months ago

            Assume I didn’t get the point: what was your point when you said ‘men should be ashamed that women pick the bear?’

            • bbuez@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              2
              arrow-down
              9
              ·
              6 months ago

              Im proud my SO would rather pick me, and I can likely speak on her behalf that she would choose the bear over you, whoever you are, and no offense intended.

              Thats the person you should be to who you choose, as soon as you’re trying to convince a woman that you’re a better pick, you’re fighting a loosing battle.

              Im really perplexed how this is complicated

              • redisdead@lemmy.world
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                7
                arrow-down
                1
                ·
                6 months ago

                I’m not trying to convince anyone of anything.

                Explain exactly what you meant when you said ‘men should be ashamed that women pick the bear.’

                Why should I be ashamed.

                Explain.