damn, hearing it from someone else hits different. sometimes i yearn for the closeness of intimate friendships but the anxiety at the vulnerability of expressing a genuinely held opinion wont let me do anything else

the ocean collective, if you enjoy the more progressive stuff

phanerozoic i

phanerozoic ii

holocene

im almost 40 and my trick is to not try to fall asleep because if i try i end up staying awake longer due to frustration. i just watch youtube trombone tutorials until i pass out.

i bought mine from swappa, they seem to have a pretty decent support system for any potential fraud.

sorry, ive never left a comment like that before and didnt realize it would look off. thanks!

aside from some of the more obvious choices (rushdie, wallace, mccarthy, morrison):

don delillo, esp. underworld and white noise

ted chiang, esp. exhalation

marilyn robinson, esp. housekeeping

denis johnson, esp. jesus’ son and tree of smoke

colson whitehead, esp. the intuitionist and the nickel boys

and while relatively new so maybe not at the same status as some other writers, jamil jan kochai and nana kwame adjei-brenyah will be making lists like these in the future if they keep writing the way they have.

there is a website for a pizza place in seattle whose website does this, maybe you can get some inspiration. dinos

just walking from michel delving to celondim

could be worse

its a weird thing to talk about, because so many times i tried to confide in other parents, and every single time i just get “oh it sounds like a normal toddler” no matter how much contextualizing i could try. youre the first person who is not my wife whose heard the story and hasnt had that reaction, so thank you.

my wife had a rough end of the day yesterday. it was mostly a nice day with our daughter (turning 4 in may) while i was at work, then out of nowhere she got hit with “i dont love you” while they were transitioning between activities. no conflict or anything.

while trying to talk it out, my daughter started saying that my wife hit her in the face and pushed her in the pool on our trip to puerto vallarta in october which is completely untrue (besides me there were four other in-laws around us at all times during the trip so there wouldve been drama if that did happen). my wife broke down because she didnt know how to handle that (what if she decided to say that in front of a teacher?).

then she just dropped it. she didnt seem remorseful, and she also didnt even say i love you to her. so when i get home, almost like rubbing it in, she starts singing a song about how she loves me. this and the fact that i was diagnosed with adhd as a kid makes me feel guilty for making my wifes job way more difficult.

this is all compounded by my wife raising her voice at my daughter a couple of times recently. she has always been the kind of kid who pushes boundaries to the max, who always grabs things without asking, whose reaction to school pickup and ending a day at the park is to run away and make us chase her. the incidents of my wife raising her voice were when my daughter decided to run while she was on a busy avenue, because despite drilling it into her head every time we get to a crosswalk, we dont trust that she wont impulsively ignore what shes supposed to do. since then she has ssid a few times she didnt want mommy to be with us for breskfast, which she and i make together every morning, “because what if she gets mad?”

really sorry for the rant and a half here, but its been that kind of day. so, i love my daughter, but i really wish she could just learn to chill out.

i shop bulk as much as i can, eat oatmeal for breakfast daily, and after i had my gall bladder removed i got in the habit of eating 2-3oz portions of animal protein no more than 5 times a week. i spend a bunch of time in the kitchen every week but it definitely softens the blow. it also helps that i have a couple of cheap staple meals i can make for less than $5 per serving.

i also shop around for value. i live near 4 different grocery stores so i dont spend a lot of time doing it, but i do make a run to grocery outlet every month in order to get discounts on bigger items but it can be hit or miss.

i am desperately praying for a pineprinter

stephen or sandi?

spicy and tingly beef biang biang, shortening this name is illegal

i imagine theres a lot of overlap.

i do understand your perspective. i have avoided social media for the last 15 years, and had only interacted on reddit very rarely before moving to lemmy, so it may be that i am less disillusioned, but it seems to me that the better the information, the less negative discourse seems to surround it. the article in the post will definitely incite a lot of negative feelings here, since it seems to confirm a lot of the beliefs of those who feel disenfranchised by the state of the world. so yea, the deck seems pretty well stacked against hope, at least on this thread.

anyway, i appreciate you getting back to me. its nice to hear some solid figures, and that does definitely give me some hope. $10k is achievable, and a 4% down payment is probably the most reassuring figure here, as a lot of the advice i hear is closer to 8-10% which make it just that much further out of reach as id have to save up twice as much or purchase a home worth half as much which is impossible in my current market.

if you could indulge me just a bit further, how far away from a metropolitan area are you? my wife has always grown up in cities and while she does like to visit more rural areas she isnt too keen on relying entirely on a car to get around, or having to own two cars to get by, but like i said before, im curious about any sacrifices wed have to make for that sort of lifestyle so, you know, if thats how it has to be then thats how it has to be.

i always assume they just stopped listening, my brain doesnt let me think people can be attracted to me.

a game where you have to pack your own bag of groceries at a self checkout kiosk without making the scale error out and avoiding direct confrontation with the attendant. and maybe bonus points for ringing up produce as cheaper alternatives.

ah, good to know. thanks for the tip!