That’s a bad joke. You’re grounded

I thought he saved his urine in jars

Then again, I guess you can save multiple things in jars

@DogPeePoo@lemm.ee I’ll give you a slice of pizza if you do it again but longer and louder

Thanks! Now that I’ve got a fan base to disappoint, it’s time say something disturbingly sexist or transphobic.

Girls have a button and boys have a pole. Wicked touching takes its toll.

And then write Harry Potter style books about himself!

• President Trump and Roger Stone
• President Trump and the Chamberpot of Secret Documents
• President Trump and the Prisoner of Financial Scams
• President Trump and Everyone’s Fired
• President Trump and the Order of the Hamberder
• President Trump and the Half-Baked Concept of a Plan
• President Trump and the Deathly Hollow Promise

Also he puts his wiener into furniture and says he doesn’t

While I don’t agree with your statement, as a republican, I have no ability to tell you whether I like or dislike what you’ve said. I know which one and only statement I like, and your statement was not it.

\s

Probably doing a golf pop

Wait wait wait, now you’re just bungling the story tooooo much.

• It was a quail hunt, not pheasant
• Yes, security detail was there, but he didn’t shoot any of them. He shot a lawyer and the secret service helped him
• The lawyer he shot also had a heart attack from one of the pellets getting close to his heart
• The secret service claim they waited an entire fucking hour before notifying the local sheriff
• The sheriff said they didn’t find out until the next day

What probably happened is he got target fixation while the bird flew in a path that… well… ooooppsssies

You forgot the best part of the whole “ooooppsssies”:
The fucking lawyer later went on tv TO APOLOGIZE TO DICK CHENEY FOR HIS BAD PUBLICITY DUE TO GETTING SHOT IN THE FACE

“I really think we should listen to what Jeremy has to say. Sure, he gets drunk and challenges children to fight him at the playground, and yes he might be a tiny bit of an arsonist, and if you’re gonna nitpick then yes he stomps on pigeons in the park, but you don’t understand! I saw him accidentally knock over an old lady the other day and he apologized! Not only that, he made sure she was okay! I think he’s truly reformed and we should trust him now.”

Also, I get why you said “pheasant” hunt and thought that was hilarious, but c’mon… If there were ever a time to bring up duck hunting, shouldn’t it be now by the infamous @FuglyDuck@lemmy.world?

submitting false payment claims to Medicare, Medicaid and other federal health care programs between 2009 and 2020 for prescriptions that were processed but never picked up

It took 40 years, but we finally found a welfare queen!

Thanks! I’m glad to know that it’s not a reference I’m familiar with and totally missed.

Just read a summary and review. Sounds terrifyingly good!

Please help with context?

It’s like a reverse She’s All That

Oh shit, I didn’t even think about that… How long you think until we roll back the name to GRIDS and pretend like straight people can’t get it?

Condoms and not sharing needles are just masks for your dick and blood, amirite?

But yea, the single mom who wants help so she can actually see her children grow up and not have to work all the time is the problem.

God, I wish the welfare queen myth were true. If something like that were actually possible, I’d finally believe all the BuT tHE ecOnOmY whiners

They didn’t call themselves People for the Gentle Handing of Historical Artifacts and they have yet to destroy or murder a single thing they’ve claimed to be interested in protecting…

This sounds like a real win-win. Looks like the swamp is trying to drain itself

I’d hate for future generations to miss out on seeing those things. It sure would be a shame for fires, floods, storms, or mass die-offs to spoil that.

What’s the point in preserving history if there’s no guarantee of a future?

You know, we’ve made massive leaps in HIV therapies and potential cures. While it’s ill-advised to seek out HIV or to treat it as a non-issue, the fact that this is being used as some sort of a scare-tactic by politicians within a world superpower is far more of an indictment of the American healthcare system than it is if any immigrants.