They’re deadly serious. Every Linux is the wrong Linux.

BSD is the only way.

(hears the rumble of the hurd in the distance)

Ah- then I have to dispute your theology on daemons.

WSL and Android, then?

South Sudan got a corporate sponsor.

“Thank you for doing the work. It’s done now, so I don’t need it any more, so I won’t be paying you. Also you can’t sue me because you read my magazine once back in the 80s and it’s in the fine print, but here’s a t-shirt with our logo across the front and back, and a commendation on your CV. It says, ‘good worker, no complaints.’ That’s exec talk for, ‘you can screw this guy over without worrying, so go ahead and hire him.’”

“I’m not paying you today. We got lots of profits and I don’t feel like wasting it on employees.”

Don’t forget the multi-million-dollar marketing campaign and funded research to convince the public it’s no different to, or even better than, real lemonade.

Feeling depressed? Lost? Lacking identity? Go back to your roots. Be an asshole.

Is your friend an asshole? Give them time. They’ll grow into a baby.

We were all assholes once. But with diligence, and nurture, you too can grow into living, breathing, people. Thank you class of '41, and I look forward to seeing you after you’re all born.

The hobby of living? Look, if you haven’t figured it out since the earth formed, it’s going to take you more than a few months to dominate in the universe.

(Also, (as an aside), as an Emacs user I feel it should be written Alt/Meta.)

Is it really? That’s interesting.

Ok

They pass TCP over UDP.

Mystery solved!

Presumably that means you are in fact a Nazi born in 1889

Ah, a fellow 13 year-old.

One of them has a more powerful, focused beam.

Ah, I was wearing a tuxedo and a dress sword, and watching on a bright pink TV with polka dots on the cover. Ergo, I am older?

By that logic, you’re younger than your body and even your mind.

I think the minimum age for online these days is something like 43? Otherwise you have to pretend to be a bot?

I think you just write it in with pencil? So you can rub it out after you’ve turned to the right page.