I would be so embarrassed if I were Mars. What a loser planet. Doesn’t even have people.

That is very interesting. Never really thought about that.

Oh I see, you are right, thanks.

That is a very positive way to say “the oldest person in the world died”

You know what would be great? A good year for everyone who is not filthy rich.

As an enthusiast for both leaf soup and bean juice, it seems like most coffee drinkers think of cheap, old, dusty teabag tea, overboiled to taste like bitter vegetables in sewage water, while most tea drinkers think of pure dark overroasted burnt coffee, preground too finely (or as the worst kind of instant coffee), tasting like acid in an ash tray, like those are your only two options.

Both coffee and tea can be so terrible and also so wonderful. I guess my favorite coffee takes quite some preparation and my favorite tea cost me about as much as a junkie’s crack addiction. But both can be really nice if you spend a little more money on a quality product and take the bit of effort to prepare it properly.

Dann, they can have so many avocado toasts.

Your scientists were so preoccupied with canned chicken, they didn’t stop to think if they should chicken.

People are so quick to judge the murder trolley system, but they don’t even understand it. They want to take away the rights of murder trolley conductors just because they have no idea what it’s like. They just hear that people die and hop on the anti-murder-trolley-bandwaggon. Sure, a few people die but it’s not that many and some of them might be bad people. There’s two sides to every story. Coming from a loving murder-trolley-conductor family I can assure you, NOT conducting the murder-trolley is the immoral thing to do. Just look at the impact on overpopulation and the decline in overall old-age disease in murder-trolley countries. I bet most people haven’t even tried it and just want to judge.

Single moms these days need to start pulling themselves up by their bootstraps. What I would do if my rent was tripled, is just reduce my avocado toast intake by 30% and go on a nice vacation with all the additional money I saved up.

SACRILEGIOUS!

Vampire Weekend were known as the pioneers of One Direction knock-offs, being largely successful with their approach of making music completely different than the famous boygroup even years before their start in music.

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That is disgusting! Why would you even post something like that? There is no way milk with mushrooms tastes good.

Apparently there are cougars in my area. I am scared now.

This has “this is the future that liberals want” kind of vibes.

“Liberals scare the living shit out of me.”

Someone PLEASE make an AI cover of Ben Shapiro singing Welcome to the Black Parade.

It was a little boulder, such a little boulder, but it reminded me of a large boulder, yeah just in miniature size.

I’m almost done eating breakfast you’ve already made me hungry again.