How exactly does masturbating prevent you from military service?

Beat me to it.

They create it with computers and feed it to the humans these days.

While giving a pass to the literal crime syndicate about to take over the government.

Does it start with an A?

Where?

Don’t you dare touch that child, you filthy perv!

They’re doing it to save you!

The Democrats are using those to blow gay mists at upstanding conservatives! Wake up, sheeple!

That’s probably the real reason. He was going to invest all that money instead of doing more stock buybacks. What an idiot!

That’s giving them too much credit. They actually enjoy killing people. All their policies are designed to kill people. Healthcare, policing, environment, you name it.

“Handmaids” would be the correct term, I believe.

Without a return trip, that’s pretty useless.

From what I’ve learned on the internet, I’d say furry porn sculptures.

So which side aren’t terrorists?

Doing his job at the troll farm.

Totally what the average Arch user looks like.

Luckily, you have nothing to fear. Unless you’re a demon, of course.

Big enough to fuck you up.

Exactly. They’re just waiting for Donnieboy to keel over, then their sockpuppet JD Couchfucker will do whatever they want.