drop your childhood stories:
>be me, age 12
>hate showering more than anything
>it feels gross and i hate getting wet
>my mom starts telling me that if i don’t shower every day then i can’t eat dinner
>i want my dindin so i come up with a genius plan
>let the shower run for 10-15 minutes while i sit in the bathroom
>quickly wet my hair with sink
>mom buys it, i get dindin
>after a month she gets suspicious
>realize i have to step up my game
>now i run the shower and rub my arms/neck with hand soap
>also run my hair under the shower so it’s dripping wet and not just moist
>she asks why i haven’t asked her to buy shampoo yet
>come up with final version of my genius plan
>i’ll stand next to the shower, let the water run, rub soap on my whole body and also use shampoo on my hair so it smells like shampoo
>then i’ll rinse off in the sink
>all while the shower runs
i did this for four years until i realized i was just showering on hard mode
It’s also called a whore bath. He might just be a whore.
A friend of mine is a non-native English speaker. He teaches at an elementary school and works with ‘English as a second language’ students. He casually mentioned that he always tells his students to take a ‘horse bath’ in the bathroom sink after recess if needed. He was traumatized when I told him that he’d misheard that phrase for his entire adult life.
That story’s as spicy as whore’s radish!
Well, he shouldn’t look a gift whore’s mouth.
I’m a whore expert and concur with this diagnosis.
Dad? When are you coming home?
Soon. Any day now.
Reminds me of a snippet of conversation I overheard at the grocery. Kid’s talking to their mom and yells “child prostitution, ever heard of it?” She was pissed.
“IT’S REAL WORK MOM”
Daaaaaaaayyyuuuummm, I wonder what was the chatter before the kid yelled that
I was split between the kid problem solving their personal money issues, or unintentionally acting obtuse with a word they’ve only heard in passing. Sadly, we’ll never know as my partner felt disinclined toward listening in any further.
We always called it military shower.