Update: I contacted with current big owners, other older friends and lastly from some friends from here. Mostly all of them living in US so they don’t want/can’t host it. So I’ll keep hosting without being on moderation side. @gavi@lemmynsfw.com will post about details I guess. @gavi@lemmynsfw.com is the new top admin.
As you know, it has been 2 weeks since I opened the instance and it has grown quite a lot. Likewise, the time I have to devote to this work has increased a lot.
I’m dealing with lemmynsfw more than my IRL job right now :D This is bothering me. Also, having an NSFW instance instead of a normal instance makes things much more difficult. If you remember; I had my biggest scale fuck up with the post “we allow loli content” :) This situation wore me out. Also a lot of problems are bothering me, both as a software and as a community.
That’s why I’m thinking of transferring the instance and the domain to a person I trust. Who can maintain the deployments and also know this stuff. I will also roll over any donations made, excluding the current month’s expenses.
I’m sorry if I’ve upset anyone. That’s all from me.
Hey just a quick FYI, if anyone here in the US is thinking of taking this instance over, I would strongly recommend becoming extremely familiar with correctly implementing section 230 of the Communications Decency Act and related laws. And I don’t mean just reading it and thinking “I am a smart person, I get this now”. I mean learning how large social media sites and their T&S teams actually implement it for real. Otherwise you will very possibly go to a PMITA prison and wind up on the sex offender registry.
I’m not messing with you. The feds do not fuck around with this stuff.
American law is honestly just deeply convoluted and annoying. Having to take into account the 50 mini countries in a trench coat hyper-specific legalities is so fun!
This is an interesting point. I am reading this from a different instance. I wonder if merely federating with this instance from a US based instance requires the same thing.
Well, there’s a discussion on the lemmy github that sort of touches on this issue, because right now instances cache federated content. So let’s say somebody posts a bunch of illegal content here, and before it gets nuked by mods it gets federated to beehaw, which caches the material. Now beehaw is technically hosting illegal material, and they may not even realize it.
Honestly would make more sense if everyone defederated it for this reason. If you want lemmy.nsfw, go to lemmy.nsfw. That way none of the other instances have that risk. And I personally would be fine if NSFW didn’t show up randomly in my feed. When I want to see it I can swap profiles or switch instances.
Sure, but that disincentivises people from posting and participating in the community, because forcing people to have two profiles is a significant barrier. Easier and better to just implement not caching images flagged nsfw in the codebase
Most third party apps for Reddit had profile switching built in. There’s a third party Lemmy app called Connect for Lemmy that just came out that boasts multiple profiles for multiple instances.
You’re not wrong about the second part, though.
Jwrboa already handles that as well.
deleted by creator
Here is a list of NSFW subreddits that protested Reddit’s API changes (for various reasons, only included if they announced it beforehand). Perhaps you could convince some of their mods, most of which pissed at Reddit, to join lemmynsfw.com or even pick up where you left off.
For clickable links, view this on Reddit
Subset of this list and this list based on this scraper’s output as of approx. 2023-06-11T16:00:00Z. Additionally, if the subreddit was not available (private already) and bigger than 5k, a manual decision based on archive.org was made. The list is incomplete also because the original list is. No guarantees on the correctness or completeness of this data.
1+ million:
r/adorableporn
r/Amateur
r/amateurcumsluts
r/BiggerThanYouThought
r/BreedingMaterial
r/BustyPetite
r/CollegeAmateurs
r/creampies
r/cumsluts
r/CuteLittleButts
r/GirlsFinishingTheJob
r/gonewild30plus
r/gonewildaudio
r/gothsluts
r/hentai
r/holdthemoan
r/LipsThatGrip
r/milf
r/nsfw_gifs
r/NSFW411
r/nsfwhardcore
r/OnlyFans101
r/OnOff
r/palegirls
r/PornID
r/porninfifteenseconds
r/PublicFlashing
r/Pussy
r/RealGirls
r/SluttyConfessions
r/squirting
r/TinyTits
r/WatchItForThePlot
r/worldpolitics500k+:
r/aa_cups
r/abelladanger
r/AssholeBehindThong
r/assinthong
r/AutumnFalls
r/bdsm
r/bodyperfection
r/Boobies
r/Braless
r/Breeding
r/burstingout
r/DarkAngels
r/darkjokes*
r/dirtypenpals
r/Exxxtras
r/facedownassup
r/FestivalSluts
r/Fingering
r/FlashingGirls
r/fortyfivefiftyfive
r/GirlswithGlasses
r/GoneMild
r/GoneWildStories
r/gwpublic
r/horny
r/Hotchickswithtattoos
r/hugeboobs
r/IndianBabes
r/MiaKhalifa
r/obsf
r/OnlyFansAsstastic
r/orgasms
r/PantiesToTheSide
r/Phatasswhitegirls
r/PLASTT
r/PornStarletHQ
r/Quiver
r/Ratemypussy
r/rearpussy
r/RileyReid
r/seduction
r/seethru
r/SexyTummies
r/shavedpussies
r/simps
r/slutwife
r/StraightGirlsPlaying
r/tanlines
r/Tgirls
r/thighhighs
r/tits
r/traphentai
r/whooties
r/WomenOfColor
r/YoungGirlsGoneWild250k+:
r/adultneeds
r/AsianAmericanPorn
r/AvaAddams
r/bootyshorts
r/BotchedSurgeries
r/BreakingTheSeal
r/BreastEnvy
r/broslikeus
r/cameltoe
r/collegensfw
r/Couplesporn
r/CuteModeSlutMode
r/datgap
r/doublepenetration
r/ElsaJean
r/EvaElfie
r/ExhibitionistSex
r/FemboyHentai
r/fuckingmachines
r/GirlsWithGirls
r/gonewildplus
r/GoneWildSmiles
r/HelplessHentai
r/hipcleavage
r/Hitomi_Tanaka
r/Ifyouhadtopickone
r/Kendra_Sunderland
r/LatinasGW
r/legs
r/LenaPaul
r/lewdgames
r/naughtyinpublic
r/NintendoWaifus
r/Nofans
r/Ohlympics
r/OnlyFansBusty
r/OnlyFansPetite
r/outercourse
r/PassionX
r/PAWGtastic
r/Pee
r/Pegging
r/pelfie
r/phgonewild
r/pokeporn
r/PristineGirls
r/RedheadGifs
r/RemyLaCroix
r/Sashagrey
r/SexyFrex
r/slightcellulite
r/spreading
r/stupidslutsclub
r/suctiondildos
r/thiccerthanyouthought
r/tight_shorts
r/titfuck
r/Titties
r/vagina
r/WeddingRingsShowing
r/westernhentai
r/WholesomeHentai100k+:
r/3DHentai
r/Alison_Tyler
r/analcreampies
r/animeplot
r/AnriOkita
r/Artistic_Hentai
r/AttackOnTitties
r/augustames
r/AussieGirls
r/Beardsandboners
r/BiGoneMild
r/Bikini
r/bikinibridge
r/Bustyfit
r/celebritymommy
r/cigars*
r/Clits
r/CockOutline
r/Consentacles
r/DadsGoneWild
r/doublevaginal
r/EdgingTalk
r/Emily_Lynne
r/erotica
r/femdomcommunity
r/femyiff
r/fetish
r/flatchested
r/fnafporn
r/FutaCum
r/futanari_comics
r/GBr4r
r/GirlfriendsNSFW
r/GirlsWithToys
r/GoneWildAudible
r/handinpanties
r/HelltakerHentai
r/HentaiForcedOrgasms
r/HentaiHumiliation
r/heteroflexible
r/hotwifechallenges
r/HypnoHentai
r/JerkOffToAnime
r/KahoShibuya
r/LegalCollegeGirls
r/lickingdick
r/Lightskin
r/MandyMuse
r/MicroBikini
r/Mooning
r/netorare
r/nopanties
r/nsfwanimegifs
r/NSFWfashion
r/Oilpen*
r/OnlyFansBlonde
r/OnlyFansBrunette
r/Onlyfanssmallgirls
r/Paizuri
r/pantsu
r/Perky
r/PetaJensen
r/Playboy_Albums
r/PornstarsHD
r/promoteonlyfans
r/realsexyselfies
r/RetailFlashing
r/RiskyPorn
r/sextoys
r/sexygirlsinjeans
r/SiriPornstar
r/SissyChastity
r/softies
r/solesandholes
r/SoloMasturbation
r/spanking
r/spidergwen_34
r/StandingOut
r/TheUnderboob
r/TheUnderbun
r/Thighs
r/ZootopiaPorn50k+:
r/18_22
r/AirplaneNudes
r/AltBoobWorld
r/animalcrossingr34
r/asiangirlsbeingsexy
r/AsianPussyAss
r/baddragonfun
r/bratlife
r/chickswearingchucks
r/dadbod
r/DaddyPics
r/DarkSidePlayground
r/DeepthroatTube
r/DIY_eJuice
r/EdgeTogether
r/FootjobCum
r/FootTalk
r/GayDaddiesPics
r/gingerdudes
r/Girlcum
r/GWASapphic
r/HorrorMovieNudes
r/jolynehentai
r/LadiesInLeather
r/lipbite
r/loona_nsfw
r/LuckyPierre
r/naturalpenis
r/NoFansCouples
r/OnlyFans101BrandNew
r/OnlyFans101Inked
r/OnlyFansNaturallyHot
r/OnlyFansReds
r/OnlyFansSHMILFS
r/Oviposition
r/Playboy_Gifs
r/predicamentbondage
r/PredicamentHentai
r/r4rindia
r/SensualMFM
r/SexTips
r/sextstories
r/SloppyKissing
r/Slutoon
r/sportsbrasGW
r/Stunners
r/Sukebei
r/Touhou_NSFW
r/uncut_cock
r/VentiHentai
r/vore
r/yaoigif
r/yurigif* = Not porn but NSFL. This is a manually curated, not exhaustive list. No subs below were checked.
5k+:
r/AceAttorneyR34
r/AltPussyWorld
r/AngelinaMichelle
r/AnimeMILFS_AI
r/ankletporn
r/ArtbonersGoneWild
r/Artistic_Ecchi
r/AustinHookup
r/AussieCouples
r/AussieDudes
r/AussieMilfs
r/AzurLaneEcchiHentai
r/BaltimoreandDCr4r
r/BDSMNot4Newbies
r/beasissy
r/bigsoftcock
r/BimboHypno
r/BlackGoddesses
r/blackmale
r/BleachedEdits
r/BleachedFemboy
r/bluelingerie
r/Boob_Holes
r/BreeDaniels
r/BrOnlyFans
r/bullypie
r/ButtsInJeans
r/CelebFapClub
r/chastitysnook
r/Cheetahfurs
r/chubbypuss
r/ChurchOfRikka
r/CLTgonewild
r/ComicPlot
r/cultofthefranklin
r/CuteTeasingGirls
r/Cuteyiff
r/CynthiaFucks
r/daddybears
r/DatV
r/ddlb
r/deerbutt
r/DegreesOfLewdity
r/DesiGoneWild
r/DFWents
r/dirtymitten
r/DirtyWritingPrompts
r/disturbingmovies
r/DoeHoes
r/doublebarrel
r/DragonYiff
r/embarrassedyiff
r/eroticpenpals
r/EscapistPorn
r/escortclientsonly
r/FeetTouching
r/fitfurs
r/FootWorship
r/furrybdsm
r/furrylingerie
r/FutaSub
r/gayknots
r/gayyiff
r/GenshinBondage
r/gfdpersonals
r/Gfurcomics
r/girlsinhoods
r/gonewanton
r/gonewildpopping
r/Grandpasgonewild
r/Hayasaka_NSFW
r/Hentai_DPs
r/hentai_electricity
r/Hentai_In_Peril
r/HentaiBitchsuits
r/HentaiEnslaved
r/HentaiForniphilia
r/hentailactation
r/HentaiNipplePlay
r/HentaiStraitjackets
r/HighEndEscorts
r/Inzestdoujinshi
r/JeffreyDahmer
r/KorraNSFW
r/KrystalNSFW
r/LadyBonersOver30
r/landingstripnsfw
r/LansingSex
r/latexfetish
r/leglocking
r/londonr4r
r/marriedsex
r/MensSwimsuitChallenge
r/MommyCock
r/MSC_irl
r/NicoletteSheaNew
r/NoFansMild
r/NSFWarframe
r/OldDicks
r/OnlyFans101Asstastic
r/OnlyFans101BabyDolls
r/OnlyFans101BadBitches
r/OnlyFans101BustyBabes
r/OnlyFans101Ebony
r/OnlyFans101FitGirls
r/OnlyFans101HotMomBods
r/OnlyFans101Mouthfuls
r/OnlyFans101TallGirls
r/OnlyFansAPAC
r/OnlyFansEasternEurope
r/OnlyFansFaces
r/OnlyFansFashionistas
r/OnlyFansFootLovers
r/OnlyFansJustRight
r/OnlyFansNerdyGirls
r/OnlyFansNeverNude
r/OnlyFansRainbowHeads
r/pussybukkake
r/QohHentai
r/r4rasian
r/r4rfurry
r/ReturnofPickOne
r/Saltysgallery
r/SanDiegoR4R
r/ScaryBilbo
r/SchoolSwimsuits
r/SexManiac
r/Sexyasmrgirls2
r/Simulingus
r/SissyHentaiBDSM
r/SmallButts
r/StomachDownFeetUp
r/TenTenBestGirl
r/Tinkerbang
r/tinygirlslargeshirts
r/TigerYiff
r/TraaNSFW
r/TribalYiff
r/vegansgonewild
r/wetspotguys
r/wholesomemonstergirls
r/WindowBeauty
r/yiff_irl
r/Yiffbondage
r/yiffcrossdressing
r/YiffgifsOnly5k and below:
r/032r4r
r/AAPWMOB
r/ageingpunks
r/AhMenOfCulture
r/AITentai
r/Amorous
r/AudioPorn4Chixxx
r/bakunyuu_hentai
r/beautevil
r/BellinghamExhibits
r/bellyinflation
r/Brassage
r/CelebSizeQueensReturn
r/ChurchOfAkane
r/Church_Of_Porn
r/crappyporn
r/creampiemature
r/cyberdildonics
r/decensoredhentai
r/emmapaisley
r/EspeonNSFW
r/Female_Yiff
r/feralhogs
r/FlareonNSFW
r/Fluttershy_NSFW
r/GauhatiGoneWild
r/girlswearingastrapon
r/GlaceonNSFW
r/HentaiBondageGear
r/HentaiSensDep
r/HeterosexualYiff
r/hifirushrule34
r/HugeToys
r/ironicallyiff
r/JolteonNSFW
r/JPMorgan
r/kasumi
r/Katty_West
r/KinkFics
r/LeafeonNSFW
r/Meowscarada34
r/MSC_yiff
r/neutered
r/newjerseyents
r/nfws_
r/NippleClampGirls
r/nocra
r/nocrapics
r/NSFWmobilewallpapers
r/OCPoetryCircleJerk
r/PissCaptions
r/PaigeNo
r/Ranma34
r/RealBDSM
r/RockyEmerson
r/SanskarGoneWild
r/scamlinks
r/selfsuckfur
r/SquirtTutorial
r/stackonmyrack
r/StepfordHentai
r/suckinginformation
r/SylveonNSFW
r/Teledildonics
r/TheRangoonMother
r/ThoseAlluringAliens
r/UlmGonewild
r/UmbreonNSFW
r/VolcanoVaporiser
r/WhitePantiesBlackHose
r/whitetopsblack
r/YouLubeHandy link to contact the moderators of a subreddit (Reddit account required)
Thank you for starting this instance. Your personal life is more important and you have already done a lot by starting this community.
I think this is incredibly important, in some ways this instance in particular, but no one can ask for more from you
Nothing to apologize for - you’re not leaving everyone high and dry, you’re hanging in there and working through what sounds like a personally difficult transition.
So I’ll just say this: thank you for taking the responsibility thrust on you with due seriousness. Most people don’t understand the importance of community, and what we owe to it.
When you hand it over, do it knowing your part is done, fully and completely.
And if you need to step away, step away - do the exchange from a distance, and if things fall through and no one you trust is there to take it, that’s okay too.
I think there’s a certain amount of responsibility when you find yourself at the center of something, but that responsibility only goes so far - if you need to step down and the community won’t step up, that’s not on you
Good luck with everything and thanks for starting this instance!
Thank you for all that you’ve done, it’s very much appreciated. Don’t feel bad about it, I totally understand why it’s overwhelming. You couldn’t pay me to run a server like this.
Thanks for your hard work.
This is overkill, just don’t host anything you aren’t comfortable with, and let people go make their own for anything you aren’t. That’s the entire point of defederated design. Ignore the idiots who think this is reddit and are screaming about censorship and let them go deal with the headaches involved by making their own places. Signed a fellow sys admin of many years who actually knows what this is like.
This instance isn’t my jam but an instance like this should really have a team behind it. That is a lot to start but once it is set it becomes immensely easier. Consider it, but it also is respectable to pass it off. Good luck.
Completely agreed. This is just too much for just one person to run everything.
That’s why I’m thinking of transferring the instance and the domain to a person I trust. Who can maintain the deployments and also know this stuff.
It’s somewhat unclear if you’re looking for someone, or you already have someone and just letting us know.
Adding my internal monologue here:
- it would be a shame to close THE nsfw lemmy server, especially since it’s so new and at the same time it got so much traction
- however, because it got so much traction, the costs will rise quickly (both in terms of money and personal time invested)
- to all you porn enjoyers (ie everyone), you can’t expect this lemmy server to survive by its own - there is no company behind it to finance it, there are no investors, there are no ads
- the only way this could work is if a lot of the people coming here would donate
I have close to 20 years of IT experience, growing from a stupid dev to a stupid manager. One of my last positions was engineering manager for a Twitch clone, which had pretty small numbers of users - the most we saw was 10k concurrent users on a stream. I’m saying all this not to boost, but to convince you that I’m not pulling things out of my ass - costs can easily reach 5 figures monthly if the growth of this server continues.
Now, if you have a phone or laptop, and the internet connection needed to visit this lemmy server, you do have spare change. If you could donate 12 dollars or euros PER YEAR, spread out in 12 equal payments of 1 dollar or euro per month, you would help immensely. Really. 1 moneys per month. You can afford it. You can be a fisherman in Uganda and still afford 1 dollar per month. You have enough coins thrown around in your car to make several months’ payments. So do that now, go to Patreon and set-up a monthly payment of 1$, if you want to see this server still around a couple of years from now.
@yay, if you do want to donate the server to someone, here’s some ideas on how to make the server work and grow:
- have a k8s setup (k3s on a couple of nodes works really well)
- PostgreSQL HA (from Bitnami) on the cluster
- separate storage box (or boxes, with CephFS or some other distributed filesystem)
- another separate nsfw server for scat/gore/other weird shit so lemmynsfw doesn’t get defederated
- consider setting up a company to own all of this, in case of legal issues
I am interested since I run servers and already have the infrastructure in place.
I just have to get familiar with running a Lemmy instance on Docker. Also, I don’t see any documentation on how to transfer a Lemmy instance.
Where are your servers based if you don’t mind me asking? Feel free to DM if you don’t want that to be public info lol
I have one dedicated server in the US and three VPS at Vultr. VPS at Vultr locations is nearest the client’s place of business since they only do a 100-mile radius of the business. My dedicated server uses CDNs from QUIC.cloud to Cloudflare. I can spin up VPS anywhere in the world.
Are you based in the US and familiar with dealing with the legal end of hosting this kinda stuff/would be comfortable doing so? For transparency I am not the person to talk about this with, @yay is, I am just curious.
I have been running adult sites since the late 90s. The legal end is not hard if you have everything in order. I have it all under a media company with business insurance.
It is easy.
If I were to run a Lemmy NSFW instance I would have my lawyer write up the exact legal terms as PornHub, YouTube, and Reddit.
My system admin would also REX any banned words, flag accounts, and flag IPs; anything uploaded would be the user’s responsibility. I would also create a moderation bot.
You explicitly invited content that would be difficult to discern from illegal, underage nsfw content
And that was a problem–Yeah, no shit
To borrow from a comment about kbin: “Making that work requires more mods than a Bethesda game”
I genuinely appreciate that you wanted and attempted to run an instance that would be largely nonjudgmental on content, but, damn, you really shouldn’t be surprised that inviting “loli” content would be (at the very least) an enormous challenge for moderation
Dude didn’t know what “loli” actually meant because he’s not a native English speaker. Cut the guy some slack already, it’s not cool to kick sometime when he’s down.
❤️ Best wishes man
As a heads up, I am more than willing to help with the front admin stuff, backend just isn’t my expertise. If someone is willing to do the backend more I can do more front end stuff. I’m experienced with management of large communities and would be comfortable approaching some of the current pressing issues in a transparent way as well as opening up some discussions with other instance admins to try and address their concerns. I’m honestly just approaching things the same way I did when dealing with a large minecraft server. Horny adults are just grown up feral teenagers, I guess.
Yeah, I wouldn’t mind helping with some of the admin load as well. Honestly, I think a space like this is important. I also have a fair amount of experience in the professional NSFW field, on the production and distribution side, so I’m at least familiar with a lot of the issues.
To be clear, I am in no way volunteering to own or host this instance. I absolutely can’t handle that level of hassle right now. But admin stuff, I’m down.
I also think that if somebody does take it over, we really need to have a larger discussion with everyone about transparency, mission, administration etc. Like is this going to be a community, or is it going to be a fiefdom? It’s really hard to have both.
I agree. Presenting a united front within the admin team is likely the best way to move forward from here, as well as to best move forward and address some recent problems. I think communities like these are important, specifically well managed NSFW communities. NSFW communities are going to exist regardless, but careful coordinated moderation really needs to be a priority to make it a space that fosters content that can exist in a legal and safe fashion. I feel also if this community is going to survive and maintain federation with other instances, there needs to be a means of establishing direct communication with other instance admins. I’ve reached out to some yiffit admins today to try and create a line of communication at least on that end. I think generally though that instance admins even outside of lemmynsfw need to coordinate together regardless and have open lines of communication to make sure their communities are interacting in healthy ways as well. That open line of communication between instance management helped mastodon stabilize as a community when a bunch of users flooded in.
