If you’re a parent that has mistakenly gone down the Elf On The Shelf path, I’m sure you’ve been in the situation where youve had a glass of six of wine and gone to bed forgetting to move the little bastard. Then to be woken up to the disappointment of your little crotch goblins wondering why the elf didn’t move. I’ve come up with a solution that hasn’t failed me yet.

Now, I know this exact solution won’t apply to everyone, but it should at least get your years grinding on how you can use your smart home to remind you to move it.

I have an Inovelli wall switch that the LED light on it can be used as a notification in my bedroom. In my case, at 9pm every night, it goes to full brightness and flashes red…it’s pretty bright, I can’t miss it. This is my reminder to move the elf. Once I do, I clear the notification and it goes back to normal.

  • alchemyearth@alien.topBEnglish
    1·
    10 months ago

    Ugh. Shit. I forgot that guy existed… Thanks for the reminder. Also thanks for whoever bought it for us… :/

  • benargee@alien.topBEnglish
    1·
    10 months ago

    Even “smarter” idea is to put an IMU or other motion sensor inside the elf. If it hasn’t detected movement by a certain time, you get a specific notification telling you so.

  • neanderthalman@alien.topBEnglish
    1·
    10 months ago

    Option B:

    A farewell letter from the elf. Based on his reports to the big guy, it has been determined that the children are at low risk of being on the naughty list, and further observation is not warranted. He has been reassigned to another post and has enjoyed his time with them.

    Then burn it, bury the ashes, and piss on the spot.

  • PineappleOk462@alien.topBEnglish
    1·
    10 months ago

    I don’t like the Big Brother is watching vibe. Bad enough you have this Old Guy in the clouds watching our every move and then this guy in the North Pole with his magic snowball and his elf spies.

    How about about just being good for goodness sake and giving Mom a break?

  • zrail@alien.topBEnglish
    1·
    10 months ago

    “Sorry kids, the elf had to leave. Their home planet needed them.”

  • secondphase@alien.topBEnglish
    1·
    10 months ago

    Huh. Interesting.

    I guess what I learned is that calling your kids “crotch goblins” just makes me ignore everything you have to say.

    TIL.

    • TK421isAFK@alien.topBEnglish
      1·
      10 months ago

      You’re getting downvoted from (presumably) a lot of millennials in which child resentment resonates, but I agree with you. If you resent your kids, get help so you don’t breed in them the same resentment your parents instilled into you.

  • BigPandaCloud@alien.topBEnglish
    1·
    10 months ago

    I always found elf on a shelf idea freaks me out. I grew up watching movies like

    Cat’s Eye (1985)

    The Gate (1987)

    Dolls (1987)

    Childs Play (1988)

  • Imalobsterlover@alien.topBEnglish
    1·
    10 months ago

    We had Yule Nissen when my son was little. It was a tiny pinecone elf. The tradition, which started in Scandinavia I believe, was to hide the elf somewhere in the house with a tiny toy or treat. For 7 mornings before Christmas my son would have to search for Yule Nissen. He loved it. We loved it because the elf could be taken secretly at any time and hidden for the next morning’s search.