I’ll start. I have to be careful drinking around other people, because I can get intensely motivational.
My neighbour used to be depressed and stayed at a cruddy job, despite poor pay. I was 17, and he was in his 40s. Well, one night we happened to drink together. It turned out he only stayed at that job in hopes that he would eventually get his parents approval, and that they would finally be proud of him. The job made him miserable.
I spent hours convincing him that he was worth more than his parent’s approval, and that he deserved to be happy. That he was the one living his day-to-day life, and that he should live it how he wants to. Many tears were shed that night. Dude quit before getting any new job prospects, and ended up working in a completely different field. He said thank you more than a few times, after everything was said and done.
That might not sound bad, but it was far from a one-off scenario. I eventually started to wonder what would happen if I accidentally helped lead someone to make a bad decision. It’s not like drunk people are known for making good decisions. So, I only drink around certain people now haha.
On a side note, a crazy number of people have problems with/from their parents.
I’ve known two people who are extremely quiet and shy sober but become loud, social, and “larger than life” when they drink. Like a massive personality change.
Always wondered whether their drunk selves were closer to their “true” selves, but they suppress it in daily life?
I somewhat feel like I’m being addressed here. I can only speak for myself but I’d agree, that this is more like being myself. Yet things/reactions that happened in my childhood/youth are ingrained so deep in my brain, that barriers where formed and the true self is somewhere in there.
Drinking partly breaks down those barriers. Good friends I had for a few years now also helped with this, so around them it became easier being “myself”.
I knew a guy who was a very outspoken but peaceful vegan, didn’t want to harm anything. Animal rights activist. Super nice guy, when sober.
But he also had a drinking problem, and totally flipped when he drank, you could almost see the switch happen in a few seconds when he was at 4-5 beers. His drunk personality was angry, paranoid, quarreling and violent, and he would often get blackout drunk and get into fights and whatnot. Got himself banned from several bars.
I didn’t know him well, but he probably had some trauma/bad shit in his life. He never talked about his family, except his grandmother who apparently had raised him, more or less.
I’m a bit like this, like less extreme at either end but I’m much more confident when drunk, I feel good about myself, I take pictures, I laugh loudly at jokes, I tell my own jokes. I think it’s closer to my true self. As a kid I was very outgoing, I’d talk to anyone, I was a theatre kid and did solos in the choir. Life has made me a much more reserved person, slow to speak and more happy to listen. Not a bad thing really but probably not my natural personality.
As a shy person, I hope that drunk me isn’t the true me. That guy was an asshole
When I still drank I was very much like this! It’s not that I actively make a point to “suppress” my personality when I’m sober, it’s more like when I would drink every thought that popped into my head suddenly seemed like a great idea lol
If I had to put a name to this phenomenon, I’d say drinking just turns off the common sense filter in my brain
Yeah it’s probably the case. The alcohol sheds their filters and social reservations that other people don’t have at all in the first place. At least I feel like that when I drink. I don’t do parties without a few drinks for that reason.
Social anxiety is a bitch but a little bit of booze washes that little crippling demon away.