Granted. A joint team of seismologists and linguists announce they have discovered that recent earthquakes have patterns that seem to match complex language. They have translated it. Apparently the planet Earth itself has gained sentience, and it’s pissed at humanity.

Granted. It’s the same language pigeons use to communicate. It’s not complex enough to communicate math and science, and everyone starts bobbing their necks to get their point across.

Granted. The language is that of the Taino. All other languages are no longer comprehensible by humans, and a written language must be created. All written or recorded work created prior to the change cannot be understood by any human.

It’s pig latin

Each dialect/accent is completely unintelligible to its neighbours.

Yes, but it’s https://www.dcode.fr/brainfuck-language

01010111 01101001 01110011 01101000 00100000 01100111 01110010 01100001 01101110 01110100 01100101 01100100 00101110 00001010 00001010 01010100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01101100 01100001 01101110 01100111 01110101 01100001 01100111 01100101 00100000 01100101 01110110 01100101 01110010 01111001 01101111 01101110 01100101 00100000 01110101 01110011 01100101 01110011 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01101110 01101111 01110111 00100000 01100010 01101001 01101110 01100001 01110010 01111001 00101110

Granted … now everyone and everything is written and spoken in the language of the deep river country, Ngan’gikurunggurr, which you’ll need to learn to read, write and speak.

Granted. You and everyone else speak and read the same language, in addition to the ones you spoke and read already.

You quicky come to understand that people are so much worse than you thought they were.

sina wile ken li jan ale en soweli ale en kulupu ale en mute la kepeken toki pona a

Fi’i zanvi’e fi la mergu’e!

Nah, where is the fun in that? I speak four and would love to learn one or two more.