My girlfriend and I are planning to move in together in ~3 months.

I own a small apartment in Amsterdam, my mortgage, heating, water and electricity is about 2000 Euro a month, and I earn 30% more than she does.

Some context: Amsterdam is damn expensive and in an housing crisis, since living here she’s been paying about 1000/m to rent a room. Both of us earn quite well and money isn’t tight

What is a fair way to split costs? I’ve heard everything from she should live here for free because I was paying for everything anyway to we should split everything 50/50, and I’m not sure what is fair.

I don’t think 50/50 is fair, because the way I see it, I’m going to get back a fair amount of the money I pay to my mortgage when I sell the apartment.

So what is fair? My gut feeling is something like we split the heating, electricity, groceries etc. 50/50. And she pays say 500 Euro a month for living here (less than half what she’s used to paying in rent)

  • Pacattack57@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    It’s up to both of you. Don’t rely on social norms because it almost always leads to disagreement or when something changes someone feels it’s unfair.

    Sit down together and decide what’s fair for your current situation and revisit it every time you adjust the budget. That can be as often as every week or month. Don’t lock yourselves into 1 agreement for ever. Expect it to be fluid and change as your financial situation changes.

    As long as you’re both happy with it, it’s fair.