One of my new friends is/was a cop. Just found out about it. I genuinely believe ACAB, and this news has me conflicted because my new friend seems really cool and super nice. I don’t know him super well yet, though. He’s a big part of this new friend group and I don’t know how to process this and how to deal with the fact he’s a cop.
I don’t want to look past the fact he’s a cop, but I want to stay his friend and stay in this friend group.
Any advice for dealing with this shit?
I can’t talk to my therapist about it until Thursday.
Uh no. That is exactly what cognitive dissonance IS.
No. If you want to correct someone, please be sure to know your definitions.
Cognitive dissonance is a process inside the observers mind. In this example it goes something like this: ‘I believe all cops are bastards’ vs. ‘I met a cop and he is not a bastard’ -> something doesnt match, thats the dissonance.
My sarcastic comment hinted at the person OP met not being a cop, but the flipside of a human that is a cop in their job and a completely different person in their freetime (like schizophrenics). This makes the second statement ‘I met a cop and he is not a bastard’ untrue and resolves the dissonance.
It is not cognitive dissonance to understand that people wear different masks around different people Your best friend can be nice to you while secretly abusing his family. Cop can treat others like subhumans, and still be nice to you. Still a bastard.