• WaxedWookie@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    Our obsession with gender is deeply weird to me (though not as weird as other languages that gender all nouns).

    Why have we decided that the most important thing when referring to people (with pronouns) is their gender, over a million other things like their hair colour, height, political prescriptions, age…

    It serves no meaningful purpose, and we as a society should get past it.

    • saltesc@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      Yeah I find it really weird.

      Society makes people really insecure to the point they have to change or assert who they are to ensure they feel they fit in how they always wanted. We’re obsessed with identity. Literally how we are seen.

      “I am an X.”

      That’s great But, what the fuck does that actually mean? Let’s put how one is seen by others, i.e. their identity, aside. What’s left to care about so much? Or is the insecurity of what others think and how one fits in with that so strong, that someone will mould themself into what others think, losing entirely who they actually are.

      “I always knew I was X.”

      Okay. But what does that mean? What does it mean to be X? Is there anything in there that has zero to do with societal identity and the traits that come with it?

      Well, in this case X = second toe bigger than first toe. So there’s the perspective. And if history shaped us that way, no one would care about gender and we’d all be fighting for surgery to snip or extend toes and rocking flip flops in winter. We’re that dumb and insecure that we change ourselves and reinforce stupid societal ideals instead of just disregard them until they eventually go.

      • WaxedWookie@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        Abolish the lot, be who you want to be, don’t interfere with others, and can it a day, I reckon.

    • CarniMoss@lemmings.world
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      11 months ago

      Do you say that when someone gets upset at being called the wrong name repeatedly? A name is something we made up but getting it wrong repeatedly shows a blatant disregard for the person it represents.

      • n3m37h@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        Sean - wrong

        Shawn - correct

        Shaun - also correct

        I get it all the time, do I care if someone writes Sea(n)? Nope, people are fucking stupid. Just like mixing up feeling and sexuality with genders

        • CarniMoss@lemmings.world
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          11 months ago

          Okay go around purposefully getting everyone’s names wrong and see how many people like it. You have the social awareness of chewed gum on the sidewalk

        • n3m37h@lemmy.world
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          11 months ago

          I just wanted a serious answer.

          Male and female is a gender

          Lesbian, gay is sexuality

          Mixing these 2 is fucking stupid

          • PeWu@lemmy.ml
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            11 months ago

            You have a point, however no one seems to support it it seems…

            We live in a confusing times.

          • NovaPrime@lemmy.ml
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            11 months ago

            Seems like you’re the only one mixing the two from what I can see (and furthermore adding to your confusion by conflating sex and gender as well). Sex is often the preferred term when referring to biology (for instance, “in many species, members of the male sex are larger than those of the female sex”), while gender is the preferred word when referring to behavioral, cultural, and psychological traits (for instance, “young people more likely to challenge the gender norms they grew up with.”). Sexuality is ones orientation in terms of sexual and romantic attraction. So you can have a woman (gender) who was born with male sex parts (sex) who happens to be pansexual (sexual orientation).

            The reason people “care” so much is because if someone tells you how they wish to be identified and referred to and you not only refuse to do so but go out of your way to misidentify them, it shows blatant disregard and lack of respect for them as a human being. If you don’t care what people refer to you that’s fine. But that’s your personal choice and you are free to make it. Those who do care about what we refer to them as are likewise free to care. And while yes you have the freedom to not respect their request, it’s an inherently degrading, dehumanizing, and downright anti-social act. You’re going out of your way to make a big deal out of it and othering it rather than just using the terms people requested and moving the fuck on with your day.

      • n3m37h@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        Respect is earned not given. I’ll give you the second one, I agree there.

        So where does this making stuff up fit in with either? It seems pretty nonsensical to me

        I’m not trying to upset ya just to understand, cuz it seems batshit crazy to me

        • PeWu@lemmy.ml
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          11 months ago

          Same. I can’t understand, why does somebody wants to be called xim/xe or some other shit? For me it sounds just like a whim, but a fact is a fact: There are only two genders. (In this context, and my worldview, sex = gender)

          If anyone feels offended, then just scroll past, I don’t and I will not care.

          • NovaPrime@lemmy.ml
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            11 months ago

            “In this context, and my worldview, sex = gender”

            But that’s the whole thing about it…your worldview doesn’t matter. Sex != Gender. You lot are just not intelligent enough to understand the difference and that makes you inherently defensive when it comes to the subject, which is why you react as any animal that perceives itself being attacked and lash out. But no one is attacking YOU by expressing themselves with full nuance. You just don’t have the faculties to understand the difference so you paint with a wide brush.

            Sex is often the preferred term when referring to biology (for instance, “in many species, members of the male sex are larger than those of the female sex”), while gender is the preferred word when referring to behavioral, cultural, and psychological traits, admittedly typically associated with sex in most cultures (for instance, “young people more likely to challenge the gender norms they grew up with.”)

  • MajesticFlame@lemmy.one
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    11 months ago

    so we went full circle. From gender being synonym to biological sex. Then making a load of different definitions for gender. And now figuring out we never needed a different definition of gender.

    Social media activism in a nutshell.